ISBF26: A Light Touch by Darlene Campos

A Light Touch

In the late 1990s and early 2000s, I was in elementary school, and like most kids, I watched TV shows that were not exactly appropriate for my age. One of these shows was The Simpsons. My parents did not approve of the show, yet I found ways to watch it often. Then, in 1999, a new show developed by the creators of The Simpsons called Futurama debuted.

Futurama’s premise follows the story of Philip J. Fry, a pizza delivery employee who is accidentally frozen in 1999 and revived in 2999, setting the show far into the future. I watched the first season or so, but as the show continued, I only watched it here and there because I did not fully grasp the humor at the time.

In 2002, Futurama released an episode titled “Godfellas,” which I happened to watch. I haven’t seen the full episode ever since it first aired, but one part has stuck with me all these years later. There is a brief scene in which one of the characters, Bender, a robot, has a discussion with God. In the conversation, Bender is frustrated and God replies, “Bender, being God isn’t easy. If you do too much, people get dependent on you and if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch.

In early 2026, my husband and I found we were going to become parents. Most couples react to such news with excitement, as it is a major life milestone, but being the cautious person I am, I was terrified, despite the pregnancy being a planned one. I started reading numerous parenting books, speaking to parents, taking parenting classes, and listening to endless podcasts about parenthood. Some sources had similar information, but others did not. One strategy I have come across is the “cry-it-out” method, which means to avoid consoling a baby who is crying at night as a way to sleep train the baby. However, there are mixed views on this method.

Critics argue that it makes the baby release too many stress hormones while supporters say “cry-it-out” builds independence. I still have a few months to go before I become a mother and the “cry-it-out” debate had me wanting to rip my hair out. So, I decided to take a break from my self-inflicted parenting crash course and rewatch the part of “Godfellas” I have fondly remembered for over two decades. After doing so, I calmed down at last.

As a child, I was raised very religious and taught that God is a father figure, one who watches over everyone because every person on earth is a child of the creator. The picture of God I was given was that of an effective parent, but as I have learned, being a parent is difficult. In the same scene between Bender and God, Bender asks, “Do you think what I did was wrong?” God answers, “Right and wrong are just words. What matters is what you do.” In terms of parenting, right and wrong seem to vary broadly. Actions are much more important. The human mind certainly remembers overly harsh or especially touching words. However, as the old saying goes, actions do speak louder than words. A child will remember how a parent responded to a situation and depending on that response, the child may either continue to ask the parent for help in the future or learn not to ask at all. A light touch is better than a strong fist.

After going through mountains of information, my husband and I felt completely lost on what exactly we are supposed to do to raise a child to be independent, but also to feel free to come to us in a time of need. The creators of Futurama shaped a significant piece of advice not only in terms of theology, but also in terms of parenting. I may not have watched Futurama as much as The Simpsons, yet I am glad I decided to one evening almost twenty-five years ago.